Defining Otherkin: The Exchange Metaphor

‘What are Otherkin?’ is a question that startlingly few people, even those who count themselves under that heading, know the answer to. ‘Otherkin’ is a relatively new term for a comparatively rare concept; the ambiguity of its definition contributing to a lot of misconceptions, as well as making it something of a catchall term.

One of the first things that an Otherkin will probably tell you is ‘its not a religion!’ and this is very true. There is no ‘god’ of the Otherkin, nor any scriptures, or cohesive rules of moral conduct and behavioral standards. Its not a culture; they don’t have traditional Otherkin garb, or specific Otherkin customs, or secret handshakes. It’s hardly even a community. Otherkin come from all sides of the religious, political, and culture backgrounds. Though it’s true that a large number fall under the ‘pagan’ heading (another catchall term) there are also a vociferous and cohesive group of adamantly Christian Otherkin.

Individual Otherkin are just that, individuals. They think, act, dress eat and worship is a variety of ways according to how they were raised and how they choose to live.

If that’s what Otherkin is not, then what, exactly, is it?

I prefer to think of Otherkin as a phenomenon; it’s just ‘something that happens’.

The broad, and I mean extremely broad, definition of Otherkin is ‘any person who believes him or her self to be in some way non human.’

In practice this generally works itself out to mean people who believe themselves to be the human (or apparently human) incarnations of mythical sentient non-human creatures, such as elves, dragons, fairies, angels and demons. The term has also expanded to sometimes cover ‘Therians’; people who believe that they are the human incarnations of mundane, non-sentient animals (such as wolves) and occasionally covers people who believe themselves to be vampires.

Yes, Otherkin are people, by and large, who believe, or at the very least claim to believe, that they are not human. Not only are they not human, but also they’re the kind of fantastic creatures you read about in ‘Lord of the Rings’. Perhaps if they were better able to explain themselves these admittedly rather ‘out there’ beliefs wouldn’t make them as much of an easy target as they currently do.

Unfortunately, any attempt to break down, narrow, or further define the term past (and even sometimes up to) the previously discussed, will likely meet fervent disagreement with at least one of the subsets of Otherkin.

For instance, most Otherkin accept that while their soul or spirit may be of non-human origin, their current body is physically completely human with all (or at least most) of the limitations there of. However, there are also Otherkin who believe that they are physically non-human; they believe that they are biologically descended from non-humans and/or that their human form is nothing more that a (sometimes incomplete) illusion.

Then there is the dispute over the origin of these souls of dragons and elves. While many would hypothesize that these souls come from another world, usually in the meaning of ‘reality’ rather than ‘planet’, there are others who believe that these types of creatures once exists here, physically on this earth some time in the distant and poorly documented past.

Perhaps the problem in defining Otherkin is that it is such a unique and personal experience, colored not only by the true underlying nature of one’s soul but also by ones human upbringing and experiences. After all, Otherkin come together as a group because they feel isolated from the central group, i.e. the rest of humanity. A “typical” Otherkin has probably spent at least a few of his or her formative years on the edges of mainstream human society, mentally isolated and strangely unable to connect even perhaps with human friends and family.

Perhaps a metaphor is in order.

In many ways being an Otherkin is like being a permanent foreign exchange student, only more so.

Imagine Madeleine. Madeleine, a French exchange student comes to stay with a family in America. She has a good, if not quite fluent, grasp of English, although no one in the family speaks French, or has ever been to France. As an exchange student, Magdalene will be expected not to know some American laws and customs, she will be expected to feel homesickness and gravitate towards things that remind her of home. She will be expected to have trouble with concepts that run counter to her upbringing. Most of all, Madeleine herself will know these feelings are natural.

People will be expecting these problems, because they know she is a foreigner, and will do their best to help her adjust and to become as familiar and at home in America as possible.

Now lets re-imagine Madeline. Let us imagine that upon setting foot on American soil Madeline has lost her memory, and for the sake of argument, does not know that she has lost it. The family taking her in believes her to be a totally normal American girl. More importantly, Madeleine herself doesn’t know anything to the contrary.  Unfortunately, Madeline still doesn’t know English fluently, but she doesn’t remember French either, and no one is around to remind her. Madeline still gravitates towards things that remind her of France, when they are available. Friends always have to remind her to do things like tip waters in restaurants and Madeline feels that she deserves four to six weeks of vacation per year, for some reason.

So Madeline still feels out of place, and people still notice that she acts like a foreigner, but now nobody knows why. It seems unnatural; after all, Madeline is just like everyone else, isn’t she? So, people who might otherwise jump at the chance to help a foreigner adjust and learn to live in America instead just treat her like something of a weirdo.

Now lets say that one day Madeline reads a book that has French people in it. She notices that they act and think a lot like she does. ‘Aha!’ Madeline says to herself, ‘I must be French’. And Madeline believes this, despite what she’s been told.

Later maybe Madeline meets a boy named Piotr, and Piotr doesn’t quite fit in either. He’s had similar experiences to Madeline too, except that he believes that he is a Russian. Piotr and Madeline also meet Domingo, Sakura, and Chow Li. None of them can prove that they are foreign (for the sake of argument), and none of them even believe that they have come from the same culture or country, but they feel drawn together because of their isolation from the American culture around them.

And that is basically how Otherkin is; despite the fact that dragons, elves, fairies etcetera might have nothing in common socially, and under other circumstances might even be enemies, their alien-ness in the same situation is what brings them together.

To be an Otherkin is to be a stranger in a strange land. Even though with time the stranger may become a friend he’ll always be from somewhere else, and the strange land, while it may become more familiar, might never be home.